Wedding lists - Page 2 - Anything Goes - Other topics not covered elsewhere - Tartan Army Message Board Jump to content

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 70
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

On 06/03/2017 at 9:13 AM, DonnyTJS said:

We just didn't tell anyone (apart from the two witnesses a week or so before). I assume our intention was posted somewhere as per the law but I don't know where and neither of our families knew anything about it. I can't remember how much the licence and admin. cost, but all in it was definitely under 100 quid. Rings added a bit to that, come to think of it ...

Aye, you can take the lad out of Yorkshire but............

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 06/03/2017 at 6:57 AM, Huddersfield said:

Apologies to anyone I offend massively here, but I think that they are up there with the most awful, greedy, consumerist aspects of modern life. I couldn't ever imagine myself plotting how to get thousands...nay, tens of thousands of pounds worth of gadgets & guff that most likely never get used.

It's nearly 31 years since I got married (on the dole & on the cheap), & we've managed just fine without whatever the 'must have' was in 1986.

I genuinely worry when I see people preparing for weddings these days. Spending years, 5-figure sums & every bit of mental energy you possess for 1 single day really feels like a recipe for disaster, & it seems like the wedding becomes an end in itself, rather than a meaningful life transition.

So, it's a no from me.

Agree 100%

Especially pointless if you're already living together, and have all the shite already.

For my (waste of time) wedding, we spent about £1500 in all, and had 80 folks to the reception – a BBQ.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Stevie_Notts said:

Agree 100%

Especially pointless if you're already living together, and have all the shite already.

For my (waste of time) wedding, we spent about £1500 in all, and had 80 folks to the reception – a BBQ.

So if you're going to get presents (this is inevitable) would you rather leave people to they're own devices and end up with 4 butter dishes and 12 breville sandwich makers (haven't got one, must add one to my list), or something that you might want/need?

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 hours ago, Stevie_Notts said:

Agree 100%

Especially pointless if you're already living together, and have all the shite already.

 

1 hour ago, Fish Gills Mcginty said:

So if you're going to get presents (this is inevitable) would you rather leave people to they're own devices and end up with 4 butter dishes and 12 breville sandwich makers (haven't got one, must add one to my list), or something that you might want/need?

 

Surely if you already live together and have all this stuff it makes more sense to have a list.

I'm not particularly fond of the idea, as it does feel cheeky, but at the same time, I completely get why it's a good idea. As you say, it's inevitable people will get you gifts, so might as well be something they want/need.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Fish Gills Mcginty said:

So if you're going to get presents (this is inevitable) would you rather leave people to they're own devices and end up with 4 butter dishes and 12 breville sandwich makers (haven't got one, must add one to my list), or something that you might want/need?

 

travel vouchers for scotand trips 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I suppose the difference when we got married was that people tended to get small things. We ended up with loads of towels, mugs, that sort of thing, but over time they all got used. A fair few of our relatives were out of work, or not well paid, at the time, so I'd not have wanted to put any expectation on them other than turn up. Which I think strikes to the core of why I feel so uncomfortable. It's maybe not so much with lists, but more about modern wedding culture. Given that 40% end up divorced within a few years, you've got to ask if spending years thinking about a wedding, instead I'd suggest of thinking about whether or not you actually fancy spending the next few decades together, or what (other than planning a wedding) you actually have in common, is very much a triumph of consumerism over human values.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 minutes ago, Huddersfield said:

I suppose the difference when we got married was that people tended to get small things. We ended up with loads of towels, mugs, that sort of thing, but over time they all got used. A fair few of our relatives were out of work, or not well paid, at the time, so I'd not have wanted to put any expectation on them other than turn up. Which I think strikes to the core of why I feel so uncomfortable. It's maybe not so much with lists, but more about modern wedding culture. Given that 40% end up divorced within a few years, you've got to ask if spending years thinking about a wedding, instead I'd suggest of thinking about whether or not you actually fancy spending the next few decades together, or what (other than planning a wedding) you actually have in common, is very much a triumph of consumerism over human values.

I agree with this.

On 07/03/2017 at 3:53 PM, Orraloon said:

Aye, you can take the lad out of Yorkshire but............

To be fair, we were in a rather unusual situation in that we'd been together for ages and just needed the certificate to wave at the Japanese immigration drones who take a rather 19th-century perspective on common-law shacking up. Apart from thinking that spending hard-earned brass on a wedding is obscene, we also knew from experience that it was less stress all round if we could keep our respective sets of parents apart - hence our never getting round to telling either family until after the (non-) event. Best 30,000 quid I've never spent.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

42 minutes ago, Huddersfield said:

I suppose the difference when we got married was that people tended to get small things. We ended up with loads of towels, mugs, that sort of thing, but over time they all got used. A fair few of our relatives were out of work, or not well paid, at the time, so I'd not have wanted to put any expectation on them other than turn up. Which I think strikes to the core of why I feel so uncomfortable. It's maybe not so much with lists, but more about modern wedding culture. Given that 40% end up divorced within a few years, you've got to ask if spending years thinking about a wedding, instead I'd suggest of thinking about whether or not you actually fancy spending the next few decades together, or what (other than planning a wedding) you actually have in common, is very much a triumph of consumerism over human values.

I was similar - some of the folk at wedding were only earning GBP200-GBP500 a month, and well i work in Oil industry - so sure as hell didn't want them stretching themselves to buy presents

money from aunt - I put towards a new kilt :-)

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Getting married in few months, we just put a wee poem on the RSVP saying along lines of " You don't need to give us anything, but if you are then a donation of cash for us to spend on our house would be much appreciated"..... I suppose some people would consider this to be " a bit cheeky"...

Personally, I think not replying to a Wedding Invite when you have been asked 6 or 7 times to do so is "a bit cheeky" but that's another story....   ;-) 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ya cynical bassas :lol:

We have just a few pieces left of now unfashionable glassware and crockery.   (I mind the gift a couple of glasses touched me from a whip round at the work I'd started just weeks before.)

But as each piece has hit the tiled kitchen floor, threads of our young-lives-past shattered away from those connecting beloved friends and relatives who generously gave us what they could.

Aaaaw fkit, kant do prose.   Take the money or punt it to charity.   (Above is true and heartfelt if pishy wrote tho' , and do give us fond memories :wub: )

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, ParisInAKilt said:

Hearing the amount of money people spend on weddings makes me feel nauseous. Pals have spent 20k + and these aren't folk who are well off either. Madness. 

I blame social media for that. Or at least think it contributes a fair bit.

Everything is a competition with folk now. Take Christmas as another example.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...



×
×
  • Create New...